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This is the strangest dinner menu I've ever seen!
Miss, can I substitute Multichrome Lab in place of french fries, please?
"Condiments?" I'll be damned, it *IS* a menu!
"Would sir like to take a look at our wine credits?"
"I could see her NEENER and everything!"
"She'll be needing to strap 'em down with Ace bandages soon if you know what I mean."
ANY SCHOOL U.S.A.!
"You're not Traci Lords, Molly. You need to ease into that stuff gradually."
"Get in the stirrups, Molly."
"Breath like a zombie, though."
.oO I'll return the double-headed dildo to her myself later on......
(writing) "Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much...."
"I love Molly and her family. And tonight, when you hit your knees, please ask God to love them too."
ANY AMITYVILLE HORROR HOUSE U.S.A.!
"You see, Jeannie's room is where all the porn is...."
So Molly thought that the "Miss Gulch all whored up" look was popular?
*stuffs down her bra*
"Maybe tonight after 'According to J--WTF DID YOU JUST SAY?!??"
"Those are Metric months though, Molly."
"Yes mother. I came home from school."
"Chicken-butt."
"Hold on a second." (lays copious amounts of paper towels on Molly's chair) "Okay, NOW sit down."
"...and at first I thought i was in a Dario Argento movie, then I remembered I haven't been in one since last month, so...."
.oO The girl has begun the bleeding. It's time to offer her to The Dark One.
"Think of it like Sweeps Week for your neener."
"Plus it'll give you a perfect Posture P#ssy."
"Why yes dear, that'll be a PERFECT way to celebrate your period!"
"Plus the elves in your stomach could go into hyperthermic shock."
"... yup, Mark of the Thorn. Michael Myers should be showing up any second now."
Capped by GlitterRock
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