Backstreet Boys--Everybody (Backstreet's Back)

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Oh great, another live action Scooby-Doo movie.

"I turned up the radio to mask the rattling noise and everything!"

Quit trying to act! You're all embarrassing yourselves!

He is this close to being a minstrel show.

"Right after my Steppin' Fetchit routine!"

Eh, could be worse. Could be a Motel 6.

Dracula's brides come in, then decide they're not that hungry.

"What the....AJ?"

Meanwhile, at Hogwarts...

He's become Grizabella from Cats!

"Damn, puberty hit fast!"

Kristen Stewart?

Oh my mistake, this woman has pigment.

And now it's a Criss Angel routine...

And he's instantly got Gerard Butler beat.

Wes Craven's Ratatouille

"Have you tried the live rats? They're marvelous!"

I don't know the air-speed velocity of an overladen swallow, if that's what you want.

Pimp Daddy Lon Chaney Jr.

Did...did you just ask your fanbase of twelve-year-old girls "Am I sexual?"

o/...For I'll live inside you forever...o/

Damn, white monsters can't dance.

This is a fan trailer for Tim Burton's Dark Shadows, right?

Um, no. No, it's not all right.

"Ow, my back!"

"Yo, yo, where my angels of music at?"

What if I don't care enough to wave my hands?

The thing from The Abyss gets a cameo!

Is she entranced, or bored?

Was there much rejoicing?
"Yeah."

"Wheee!"

So Mr. Hyde was actually some kind of fish creature?

If you rock your body wrong, see a chiropractor.

Somewhere a wrap fetishist is getting off on those girls.

Is the backing track losing battery power?

It's a prom attended entirely by Harlequin Romance cover models!

Imhotep's in da house!

Is that a threat?

Sweating bats is one of the lesser-known vampire powers.

So, this video is basically a cross between "Thriller," the Universal Monsters, and Teen Beat.

Still, it was nice of Tim Burton to let them shoot in his foyer.

Do the Awkward Geek!

"Now, on the floor for leg lifts! And one, and two..."

"Fear my open shirt!"

"No, if I hit puberty my career will be over!"

"I dreamed that Michael Jackson sued us..."

"I had a terrible dream too! We were in a framing scene for a video, and they forced us to recite lines!"

"We are confessing the homoerotic ones, right?"

"I'm your bus driver now!"

Capped by TheDiva

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Rebecca Black--Friday

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Great, High School Musical font. This does not bode well.

Quoting better songs isn't going to improve your crappy song any, honey.

Oh no, we've hit a time warp!

o/...Did my hair and makeup in my sleep last night...o/

Is she possessed by one of those creepy J-horror ghosts?

Starring Marilyn Monroe!

Amy Adams?

"Come on, we're going to get thrown from the car and into the side of a semi, it'll be fun!"

The existential dilemmas our young people are faced with these days...

I didn't think it was possible, but she's so Auto-Tuned it's wrapped all the way back around to tone deaf.

They pass a car full of Alanis Morrisettes going the other way...

That's great, kids, just keep pretending the car's actually moving!

o/...Till her daddy takes the T-bird awaaaaaaay!...o/

Highway? You're sitting in front of a Target Photo backdrop in a car none of you are old enough to drive; just accept it...

This is what ten-year-olds think being sixteen is like...

*girl on left* "Thanks Becca, what am I, chopped liver?"

Yes, if I've learned nothing else, it's that she's got this and I've got this.

What I wouldn't give for this to turn into a cautionary driver's ed film right about now...

You got into Mommy's makeup again, didn't you Rebecca?

Call me old-fashioned, but I prefer the classic Dragnet theme.

I'm looking forward to the end of the song.

Her youth group throws the BEST parties!

People prone to seizures should not watch Rebecca Black.

....Come to think of it, that's good advice for people who aren't prone to seizures, too.

"We pass remedial English!"

Maybe this is just a failed Sesame Street segment.

Oh no, another video is trying to muscle in on her territory!

Break it down, MC Lamer!

It was nice of them to give the pedophile hanging around outside the school a cameo in their video.

So, their junior high production of Bye Bye Birdie was having a cast party and just decided to make a music video, huh?

Wave your hands in the air like you just kind of vaguely don't care!

Parents, don't let this happen to you! Don't let your children watch Glee!

And there was much partying.
"Yeah."

Is she in the Netherworld?

Even the extras are having a hard time looking excited at this point.

"Yeah, kick it girl. We're going to ride the bile of YouTube commentators all the way to stardom!"

*Weekend not available in all areas. Partying partying and fun fun fun fun results may vary. Offer not valid in VT.

*checks watch* And her fifteen minutes will be up just about...

...now.

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